Re: My Little, Personal Hell [Calypso/Kokuto]

Thu Sep 03, 2020 8:14 am

My Little, Personal Hell [Calypso/Kokuto] - Page 2 6EdIfMt

ENTER THE DREAMER

Artist: Carrotwine - Song: Dark Side Of The Road

"Everything..?"

Calypso's soft voice had a hint of disbelief as she rested her head against him, slowly turning to lie on her back with her head on his lap. She felt at her chest, noticing the lack of softness over her heart, which caught the girl by surprise, but she didn't want to look down. She felt like she'd be thrown into an inconsolable state if she looked down, so she kept her gaze on Kokuto,

"I'm... I.." She tried to figure out how to start, her eyes darting to and fro as she unearthed that memory that she seldom revisited. She wasn't sure why - She had met her sister and they had a good time and bonded, didn't they? She always thought this joining of their souls was a protective, loving measure, a typical thing amongst demons. Why did she never think about it..?

"I-I mean.. I don't remember everything.. It was such a long time ago and I got a bit funny in the head towards the end, but.. I'll try."

Her gaze lowered, "I'll try.. Uhm.. So, Mom sent me Algos' way a while back. I ran into her, we spoke for a little, Algos squished me against her chest.."

A light prismatic blush formed on her face as she took a deep inhale and continued, "I was really nervous and hesitant throughout the whole thing, but I was kind of a coward back then anyway... She lied us down and kept... Kept... Inviting me..? I don't know, I just know it was something I felt hesitant towards."

Caly seemed a little uneasy trying to think back, trying to recount the events to the best of her memory, "..Then... And then... Uhh.. I think she gave me something to drink? I was feeling really confused and... Oh, wait, I drank something she gave me and drank her blood. I think.. I think I drank a lot of her blood, too.."

Her body was trembling once more, as she felt oddly stressed. She couldn't understand why telling this was so difficult, it was hard for her to remember the latter end of it, "..I just, felt a lot of things, powerful things... We did stuff in bed.. And im pretty sure, she marked me near the end, and we fell asleep."

Her eyes slowly darted to and fro, "..I.. I still don't understand why this matters.."

Thu Sep 03, 2020 2:55 pm

ENTER THE WANDERING DEMON

Artist: Persona 3 - Song: Living With Determination

Kokuto let Calypso rest her head in his lap, gently giving her a pat on the head and running his fingers through her hair. As she struggled to find a starting place, he gave her a warm, reassuring smile.

"It's alright, Caly. Take your time."

He fell silent after that, letting her relax and collect her thoughts. It wasn't like there was a time limit, he had all the time in the world for her to remember. Even if she didn't remember absolutely everything, if the night with Algos was that important, she would remember what she needed to. It was what happened with his own sister -- hell, Caly was basically a spitting image of her right now with her actions.

Just...a lot more demonic power and crazy supernatural stuff.

He made sure to listen intently as Calypso started retelling the story. Mana sending her toward Algos -- big surprise there, Mana sending someone off to another for help -- and he quietly nodded. His eyes narrowed at the physical contact between the two -- Algos pressing Calypso against her chest. He had a bad feeling about this, and it felt scarily familiar.

She continued, and it only got worse. She was nervous and hesitant through the whole thing, and Algos kept 'inviting her' to that, even with Caly's hesitance. A lump formed in the demon's throat. He had an idea of what had happened -- that familiar feeling continued to creep up his spine. The mention of being offered something to drink, as well as drinking a lot of her blood was what confirmed his suspicions.

His body started to heat up in response to his growing anger. He took a deep breath, gently patting Calypso's head again in order to keep himself grounded and to calm himself down. After a few moments of silence, he looked down at Calypso.

"Just answer me this...did you want to do any of that? I want you to be honest with me. Looking back, did you feel comfortable, safe, or feel at any point in control of yourself when that was happening?"

Thu Sep 03, 2020 4:04 pm

ENTER THE DREAMER

Artist: Carrotwine - Song: Dark Side Of The Road

Calypso could sense the man's rising anger, which made her feel somewhat hesitant towards continuing to talk about this. She didn't understand how something from such a long time ago would matter now, and especially in this instance. If Kokuto was going to have an issue with how Algos behaved, wouldn't it have been the one he and everyone else was involved with? She never even told anyone about how they met, she just assumed everything was fine and good, it was just an experience that didn't need to be discussed to death and back.

Confusion remained instilled in her as Kokuto asked a very unique question - If she wanted any of that. She stared at him, dumbfounded for a few seconds, as she searched her mind for the right answer,

"O-Of course I did!" Speaking the words immediately felt wrong, doubt searing her mind the second she spoke them, "..A-at least, I think I did... I.. I have to have... Or else why would she.. I..."

Tears bubbled in her eyes once more as she tried to figure out what to even say, what was actually the truth, "I.. I felt really.. Uncomfortable, until she offered me a drink.. I said yes, and.. Ugh.."

She pinched her nosebridge, trying to get over her conflicting thoughts and emotions about that night, "She.. She didn't force herself on me! I was the one who wanted did it to her! I mean... I.. I mean... I think that's what I wanted..? That last part's a jumbled mess, I... I don't know!"

Calypso was getting more and more visibly upset, her lip curved down in a frown, "I.. I don't feel okay thinking about this stuff, Kokuto.. What are you even trying to say..?"

Thu Sep 03, 2020 5:18 pm

ENTER THE WANDERING DEMON

Artist: Persona 3 - Song: Living with Determination

It hurt how similar this was.

The moment she said that she wanted it, he knew that she was lying. She'd hesitated, and he could sense that there was doubt in her mind the moment she spoke. Not long after did she started revealing those doubts, and it only made his heart sink more and more. Then, finally, the truth came out. In reality, she had felt uncomfortable during the whole thing.

His suspicions were right, and he hated the fact that they were.

The lump in his throat grew. Algos had been pressuring everything on her -- the drink, the sex, everything. Kokuto didn't say a word as Calypso continued, only keeping her close to him, making sure she was ok. As she finished, Kokuto could feel dread surging up his back like a spider. He was angry and upset. He felt guilty that this had happened, that she didn't even understand what was truly wrong with it, but most importantly -- angry at himself that something like this happened again, to someone so similar to his sister.

His voice was a hushed whisper as he spoke.

"Algos pressured you into doing all of that."

He turned to look at Calypso, pausing for a moment as his gaze faltered. His lip quivered as tears of his own started to well up in his eyes.

"Fuck..."

He turned to face her again. The lump in his throat was more present than ever, and he didn't want to tell her. Part of him didn't want to relive this moment again, playing therapist for his sister, and finally telling her the truth of what happened. It hurt so much for him to see and realize the parallels, the signs, everything that lined up almost perfectly.

"Caly...That was rape."

Thu Sep 03, 2020 6:03 pm

ENTER THE DREAMER

Artist: Carrotwine - Song: Dark Side Of The Road

She stared up at him, only feeling so much more vulnerable and ashamed, confusing feelings flooding her mind and body as she could sense his own - Anger, concern, anxiety.. Calypso herself felt as sick as she was confused. She didn't want to talk about this anymore, it made her feel uncomfortable, scared, like she had done something wrong. She almost wanted to just stop talking or run away so she wouldn't have to continue this, but her body refused to follow her fears.

As he faced her and whispered that Algos had pressured her to do all of that, the demon's eyes were wide, visible shock on her features as she simply didn't want to believe what was happening right now, "..No.. That.. That can't be right... It was.."

She only fell deeper into the hole as she saw tears form in his eyes. She was confused, she felt her heart roar in her ears, she almost wanted to tear her ears out so she wouldn't have to keep listening. She felt sicker and sicker by the second, she wanted that sensation to stop. She almost didn't want to hear the truth.

But whether she liked it or not, the man's scarred lips would move once more, to deliver her the reality.

Calypso's expression blanked as she heard that sentence. She didn't react initially, Kokuto's words being met with dead silence. Slowly, the demon moved to sit up, however a look at the scar on her chest would reveal it was dripping with darkness. She got up, walking halfway away, before she stopped, her hands raising to touch her face.

While her emotions were silent, the presence she radiated was strong, suffocating as she stood there wordlessly, staring down as that word was in her head. That filthy word. She kept thinking back to that night, over and over, playing before her eyes in her state of shock. Those feelings, those fears, that resistance, even when she was drowning in the sea of lust, there was that little voice, that little desire, far back in her mind.

I don't want to do this.

Her throat burned, as shade colored liquid began rolling down her cheeks. Her body trembled, head dipping forward as the only sound she made within a few minutes was a gentle cough.

"... Is that what happened..?"

Her hands went to her shoulders, grasping them tightly, to the point her nails stabbed into her flesh and drew her essence,

"..N-no... That can't be right..."

A soft laugh shook her being, her body falling to the floor, the girl sitting on her knees as she was torn down by the weight of her emotions,

"..I said yes to that drink... I drank her blood.. I was the one who had sex... I lead... I had control.. I.. I couldn't have been... No.."

Several more coughs followed, droplets of pure darkness flying out of her mouth as she shivered, her voice oh so soft and delicate,

"You.. Must've misunderstood me... Yeah that's right, you just.. Didn't understand what I meant.. She wouldn't do something like that to me..."

Her mind filled with the burnt image of Algos' pure rage and delight as she had her tied down, her hand in her chest as she forcefully burned away Resolve Flame,

"She..."

Thu Sep 03, 2020 8:25 pm

ENTER THE WANDERING DEMON

Artist: Pokemon ORAS - Song: Zinnia's Theme (Sorrow)

He hated seeing that look in her eyes. Her looking and feeling so vulnerable and scared -- it hurt him as a person, as someone who used to be an elder brother and wanted to protect his sister with every last ember of life he had in his damnable body, and it hurt him to see someone who didn't deserve to go through such hell and hurt be forced to realize what had happen. He didn't really have much of a choice, she had to face reality if she was going to heal -- even if she wouldn't completely heal or forgive her.

He hated the fact that he had to say that word: rape. It was such a disgusting, horrible word that brought the worst taste to his mouth, it made him shudder in disgust and seethe with anger at the painful memories that word brought for him, both then and now. He didn't move a muscle as she sat up, only glancing down at the scar on her chest, feeling the emotional turmoil that raged inside her, and standing up as she started walking across the room.

She was still in denial. Kokuto sighed quietly as he walked across the room and gently put a hand on her shoulders, the tall demon kneeling down next to her and hold her steady as he quietly responded.

"She pressured you into saying yes. You didn't make that choice out of your own will, Caly. Just because you said yes, doesn't mean that it wasn't forced."

Thu Sep 03, 2020 9:21 pm

ENTER THE DREAMER

Artist: Carrotwine - Song: Dark Side Of The Road

Her hands slowly rose up to her temples, fingers spreading out across her face as her emotions kept climbing and climbing to a point she couldn't take. Her mind felt like it was on fire, with each beat of her heart it grew more violent, her jaws parted, dripping black fluids as she could sense Kokuto come up behind her, flinching when he placed his hand on her shoulder, her body freezing as she heard his voice once more.

They were like sharp knives, cutting into her denial, slashing it to pieces as she remained stiff and silent for a moment, her face hidden by her white locks as her stress hit a fever pitch in this moment. The humanity of her appearance seemed to falter due to this; Occasional eyes would blink open and shut along her body, a few remaining open, looking around erratically. Her fingers would blacken, turning into claws as she slowly dropped her hands, lifting her head to look at Kokuto.

Random spots on her face had turned into black splotches of scales, dark tears rolling from her eyes as her sclera had turned completely black, her irises glowing white as her lips were formed into a plastic smile, the same black fluid running down the corners of her mouth,

"Okay."

Her voice was soft, unnervingly so as her hands touched the carpet, though as soon as her palms touched the floor, her clawed fingers suddenly tensed, creating defined clawmarks on the floor as her hands trembled, her head lolling to the side as the stress and terror in her mind spoke through her body,

"Okay."

Her tone sounded noticeably more strained. She wasn't sure what she was trying to do, it was some strange mixture of wanting to vent yet preventing herself from exploding. She slowly got off the floor, clawed hands raising to weave themselves through her hair, her letting out a sad, disheveled laugh as she walked to the other side of the room. She couldn't help but laugh, laugh that despair out, as she leaned against the wall, letting out a coughing fit as she gasped,

"...Am I just a plaything?"

She leaned back against the wall, her head raised to the ceiling as she uttered that thought, "So far my family has either abandoned me, harmed me, or used me."

She let out a labored breath before continuing, "I've only ever wished to help them, and what do I get in return? In some way or another, chewed up and spat out."

She let out another laugh, the eyes among her flesh crying her shade fluids of despair as well, "Is that what I am? Is that my role? Some thing to be used? For my kindness and compassion to be taken advantage of, now and forever?"

She coughed and heaved, suddenly a retching noise coming from her throat, as she tried to cover her mouth, but her head bowed, a sickly noise coming from her as she puked pure darkness, making a proper mess of where she stood, her breathing weak and shaking as she was bent over, trembling,

"My o-own mother.. D-didn't even take note of m-me.. U-until I c-confronted h-her, on h-her bullshit.."

Another river of putrid spew came from her lips, her clawed hand slamming against the wall to keep herself off the ground, violent wheezing coming from the demon as there was visible dark circles under her eyes,

"And now.. Y-you t.. Tell me, that, hahaha... T-that.. Hahahaha.. At least, for a while, just a little bit, one of the only positive relationships I could ever have at the moment, was started from rape."

She covered her mouth, eyes shut, the sound of sobbing coming from her covered lips as she tried to prevent herself from throwing up once more,

"Hahaha... Holy shit, no wonder everyone fucking hates my family. I can't fucking blame them. I can't... I just can't.. They're just are, or were, fucking awful.."

Her clawed hand was brought to her chest, covering her scar, "..And where the hell does that leave me? Am I just going to become awful, too? Because it just seems like a fucking curse - You either become awful, or die horribly."

Fri Sep 04, 2020 8:32 pm

ENTER THE WANDERING DEMON

Artist: Pokemon ORAS - Song: Zinnia's Theme (Sorrow)

The reaction and realization was always the worst part of it all. Kokuto remained silent as he watched her slowly let go of her denial, her body and powers likely causing the physical reaction that was unfolding. His hands instantly lifted from her shoulders as she flinched, and he took a step back to give her some space. He shivered a little at the slow detereoration of her human appearance.

Part of him wanted to hold her and tell her that it would be ok -- but he knew that wouldn't help right now. As she walked to the other side of the room, Kokuto cautiously took a couple of steps forward, just to stay near her on the off-chance that he needed to step in. As Calypso finally began to speak her mind, the demon's expression turned to one of sorrow as his eyes closed halfway and his head lowered.

Very slowly, and very carefully, Kokuto took a few steps forward, gently resting a hand on her shoulder, though was more than ready to remove it if she needed it. The Asthavons weren't the best of people -- Mana being the prime example. They were filled with awful people, people who just seemed to be born and radiate the worst of intentions. But, he knew that her attempts to help people weren't all in vain, because of one person: Vanyel. While he didn't know the guy personally, he knew that he had been in Shadow Fall around the same time that he was -- as well as them being linked through the Seal of Eris.

Though, it seemed like that wasn't the only endeavor the little lady had gone through, as Kokuto's brow rose at the mention of confronting Mana on what she had done. But, he still held his tongue. She needed to get this out -- and he had no intention of stopping her.

A small period of silence came as Calypso finished. With a soft sigh, Kokuto spoke.

"If it's any consolation, from what you've told me, It doesn't sound like Algos saw it the way that it is. Many Asthavons are awful people, that's true. Mana isn't the ideal role model for...a lot of things, but..."

He paused, gently tapping his chest where the Mark of Eris resided on him.

"You confronted Mana Asthavon. Not a lot of people are willing to do that, much less have the guts to do that. I can tell that she's not the same person she was when I met her. That doesn't excuse what they did, but it should tell you somethin', Caly, that it's not all hopeless."

Kokuto took a few steps away, picking up the chair and setting it down next to her, gesturing for her to sit down.

"You're tryin' your hardest to break that curse. If you ever became as awful as the other Asthavons, I'd be surprised."

Fri Sep 04, 2020 9:25 pm

ENTER THE DREAMER

Artist: Carrotwine - Song: Dark Side Of The Road

It felt like her heart had knives driven into it as it almost sounded like the man was about to make an excuse to lessen the blow of what Algos had done, darkness abruptly splurting from her chest, but soon stopping as he went on about her mother instead. It didn't put her at ease, rather just prevented an immediate outburst based on likely misunderstood sentiments, inclined to listen to what Kokuto had to say about her mother, after that 'but'.

She listened to his words, heard his heart, her expression remaining unchanged, however she understood where he was coming from. This didn't calm her, not in the slightest, but she did have something to be reminded of - That she did make some kind of positive connection with her mother in that incalculable time she had with her within her chaotic domain, that she managed to induce at least a little change.

A small sob was brought to her breath, hands squeezing so tightly that blood was drawn and dripping from them as she would kick the chair, causing the piece of furniture to fly into a wall, averting her gaze,

"I don't want to sit. I just want to be angry, for once in my life."

Thrusting an arm forth, she would tear space to open a small portal to someplace deserted within Demon World - That she could vent in peace,

"Ill keep it open long enough if you want to come watch me have a bitch fit."

With no hesitation did she vanish into the darkness of the rift, the space slowly closing up but not so fast that the man wouldn't be able to follow her through if he was intent on it.

Sat Sep 05, 2020 5:29 pm

ENTER THE WANDERING DEMON

Artist: Pokemon - Song: Zinnia's Theme (Sorrow)

Kokuto took an abrupt step backward as the chair was suddenly thrown across the room, landing in the wall with a loud bang, making the man jump in surprise. He understood that she was angry -- it was another thing that showed more parallels between Calypso and his sister. He wasn't going to tell her that it was wrong to be angry -- no, far from that, it was a perfectly normal reaction, and he had no right to take that away from her.

But, as she tore open a rift in the space in front of them, leading to an isolated, deadened area of the Demon World, it didn't take Kokuto long to figure out what she wanted to do -- her next words only confirming it. Kokuto groaned quietly, putting a hand to his face as he contemplated whether or not he should follow her. If he were being honest -- there were more cons to him not following than if he did, and he mumbled.

"If I don't follow her, I'm probably gonna have at least two or three people on my ass for not keeping an eye on her during this..."

Fuck it.

Kokuto sighed as he took a step forward, stepping through the vortex and following Calypso -- partially in hope that this venting would help, but at the same time, wanting to keep an eye on her and make sure that she didn't do anything terribly stupid. While he wasn't as close to her as someone like that human that she was with frequently, Kokuto still cared about the other members of the family. They were, well, family -- and to that degree, they meant something to him in some form. So, preparing himself as much as he could, Kokuto stepped into the quiet, empty outskirts of the Demon World.