Loathsome Soul [Algos/Santa/Open]

Algos ceased moving when asked if there was a reason for this conversation. In that instance, she let the other woman speak to divulge what it was she was trying to get out. So, for that time, she closed her eyes and tried to ingest what it was that was trying to be conveyed by her words. The Demoness did not feel as if she lacked interest in the conversation, so there was almost a brief look of confusion as she pondered just how far this pain was reaching within the depths of her life. Normally, there would be such a more festive sense of self and grand display of interest, but whatever was within her felt like a dead core. As if someone ripped her heart out and left only a shell of a person and it was difficult to discern through the shadows of that internal hell.

So, the woman's eyes opened as her gaze seemed devoured by the night itself; leaving only two orbs of glowing blood-like light behind them. There was a look of deep contemplating of the woman kept her stare on Ajura as her mind started buzzing around different thoughts to piece together the disjointed sentiment flowing in her mind. What has changed about her? What could she even turn into at this point? It was difficult to let sentiments of the past leave. To let go of that which was yesterday and so golden in its innocent glow of life to a cold, unknown future when chained by these venomous actions of a former self. It was hard to deal with, but she knows these were just consequences of her own actions and beyond that veil of certainty she did not want to let slip that she was rather uncertain of how to press forward.

Indeed, there wasn't anything left to do but bleed out these sensations toward Ajura. Plums of blood aura which was produced by her energy would begin to flow over the hollow's body, and even though they lacked hostile intent, it was still her choice to either move out the way or let them envelop her. In the instance they connect, then this same reflection of her current state of mind, feeling, and thought could be shared. Words that could never be spoken would ease into the mind and the state of her own heart could bridge what she felt she could not speak of.

"Feel for yourself what I am capable of. If you want to read my heart, I'm not opposed to that."

There was a low snarl that emitted out of the demon's mouth before Algos moved slowly forward and just rested her hand on Ajura's heart to feel something beside her own coldness. It was as if she was trying to drain that sense of light in her to feel something other than this deadness in her chest. Perhaps she could drench blackened tears her cheek, but would pitying actions like that achieve anything? She was tired. A heavy tiredness at that. And it was apparent that whatever she was doing was not working for her own sense of satisfaction in life. So, she moved her hand into Ajura's and continued to stare at it before uttering out these words.

"I came here because you were one of the few I feel I had left I could perhaps find something to move forward with. I did not desire to lose that connection to you two, so I forced myself to find you."

It felt like poison to say such things, but it was her own honest truth and she needed to continue to face these uncomfortable circumstances if she were to try and move past these things.

"I've changed, but it's hard to tell if that change was...beneficial. You seem content with your existence even if you are striving for more. So tell me: how would you even change in my position? I opened myself to you because...I trust you."

Algos closed her eyes for a moment as she just ingested everything the woman said. There were many words that were spoken to describe the status of her current life, but what cut through the most was her own capacity to cut through the aspects of her soul which were keeping her in that state of misery. While The Princess doubted she needed to go as far as to bring down her own intelligence to find that place, there was something which she could do to begin to view things from that perceptive which was not filled with woe. It wasn't going to be something that came easy, however.

In that instant, the demoness let go of Ajora's hand as she remained silent as a slight tear fell down her cheek before a course of determined action took place. During that point in time, the demoness markings appeared to begin to bleed away; causing even her dress to begin adorned in a white glow as a slight exhale of breath left the woman's lips. At that moment, a mist of snowy energy surrounded her as the woman was that left seemed -- unmarked.

"To revert to that stage would mean to give up what I am as a demon."

Voice sounded more serene, the girl turned her hands behind her as she gazed up at the stars. Thinking between her many prior lives, there was a certain melancholy in reflecting back to times that were more golden than her current lifetime. This life had been stained with so much corruption, woe, and grief that there was no respite from her element unlike in prior lives. So, perhaps, the cycle could cease here. Algos yielded the potential to live without this power, but what would be left of her? Something terrified her and that fear was lacking that power. As without it, there was not much else she had to claim in this world. And being powerless was a fate akin to death with the blood she had sown.

Therefore, The Demoness placid blood eyes sought to gaze back at Ajora as a soft look of sadness came across her face:

"I can live like this, but I would get weaker. I'm not sure if I can handle that. The only thing I'm worth to this world is my strength, without even that, I may as well embrace death's hand."

And that's what she believed at this moment. All of her influences, power, riches, and all of that are what she assumed any other soul would desire her at this point. Even if there was a part of herself that believed such relationships could blossom without it, that blackened aspect of her spirit lingered at this moment as she glanced at the shadow behind her filled with a red stare as her repressed nature snarled for control once more.

"And you are wrong, I have nothing left to lose at this moment. My world is in chaos, my family disbanded, one of my children is an enemy land and my lover is dead. There isn't much for me to fear anymore besides trying to still be a mother to the child I still have. But even that feels fleeting when they grow..."

Without much warning, the woman just kept walking toward Ajora. With a tired expression on her face, she just held her and closed her eyes once more before looking up at her.

"...before this curse bled on me, I suppose that un-tainted self would want to love something if you must know what that flicker of recognition would do."

What could a new start potentially achieve? There was a look of dullness in her eyes as she contemplated that. Her soul was not one that would simply be doused out from existence. Her life potent vessel as she did harbor the essence of grief within her essence. That being said, it did not prevent her spirit from being reborn if this current life came to an end. So she did not fear death, but the powerlessness of starting again without her strength at her side in a world that relies on power was not a choice which felt good to make.

Even staring at the visage of endless deceased souls before her in this boundless world, it did not bring a sense of torment or discomfort to her. She has killed, she has the essence of death's energy flowing in her veins; the reality of a soul's end does not terrify her and on some level perhaps being killed in battle would bring some grand spectacle to her life. A grandiose ending to a grandiose life, no?

So, the woman closed her eyes and pondered. There wasn't really anything left to salvage from her current life in her state of mind at the time being. Perhaps reincarnation couldn't be bad, or altering her current state. And she was fairly certain there was no one left for her to find any sort of attachment or connection to in this world.

Hence -- what was the point of all this? It was all pointless, perhaps. To live, or to death; it was all a struggle filled with endless suffering all the same to her. Thus, an immense tiredness swept her as she continued to stare into the pit.

"I do not fear death. A life where I lack control of what I desire to do is something that unnerves me, yet there isn't a direction I desire regardless. It all feels pointless no matter which direction I chose."

The Demoness continued to reflect on the notion of pointlessness further even as she spoke. What was even worth doing anymore? Her eyes closed and she just remained in silence before speaking once more.

"I could slaughter my demonic essence to cull this possessive hunger and shape an entirely new being because being in this form weakens me, but honestly, what would be waiting for me if I were to do that in a world where your quality of life is based on the value, power or resources you have?"

Quiet. Everything was quiet. There was only the beat of the demon's heart thumping in the abyss as she fell to her knees; feeling some form of tears coming to her face. It was too much to ask to give up all of this protection and strength, one that was built from the core of an already dead version of herself. One that just wanted to make her kingdom happy, family proud, and to have purpose, value, and strength. And by the blade of her own actions, all of that was perverted and burned to the ground. Yet, it was too daunting to give up that possessive power that killed everything to begin with.

Algos was uncertain of how much time passed here, and did it truly matter? Perhaps she was already dead once more. It was hard to come to terms that things were so utterly broken that it was hard for her to truly accept this life anymore. A mass weight was placed on her soul and she could feel it wanting to scream out once more. In spite of that, though, she still remained in this uncorrupt state. It made her weaker, she was feeling pale and faint as breaths of steam exited her mouth; but she couldn't accept things as they were.

How would she let go of this? Should she let go of this? Is it worth all the pain? WHAT IS THE WAY FORWARD?!

No.

This place was perfect.

Everything was dark, her future uncertain and her soul in disarray. She thought she had the answer not too long ago, perhaps doubling down would have worked; but this life isn't working.

In that sense of awareness, the woman was drifting in a liquid sea of blackness. Soon, that snowy hair of the demoness started to bleed until it gave way to a plum hue. All the while, the pale water around her materialized into her own power staring back at the woman. With its possessive grip, it grabbed hold of the smaller demon's face as Algos's now plum eye stared back at the reflection of her own might.

"So, is this it, is this where you wipe your hands clean of me in hopes of some magically better life as a weakling? You are me, and I am you; and we both know there is nothing but hell awaiting without our power at our side."

Even as this pale ghost of herself uttered these words, Algos was exhausted. Her violet eyes were her own, inexperienced sights to claim. All of that pain, suffering and might; it was perhaps needed for a time. To see if such ungodly power could bring happiness, to find something grander to ascend to and tower over others without fear of them harming her. Yet, at this point, that was tiring. It was utterly empty.

All Algos could think of were the looks of shame from her family, the long line of dead friends and lovers alike, the shattered remains of her own, and that ever-present visage of Neoveta's own ghost lingering behind this pale ghost. Perhaps it was time to put an end to this cycle of Algos. Whatever that even was at this point. Whatever this woman was needed to progress.

"No. That Arrancar isn't the cause of this. This is the cause of something deeper. You know it to be true as well. This is just the reflection of our action and this farce has gone on long enough."

Soon, the plum-haired woman embraced the pale ghost as her exhaustion grew heavier. With her hand on the ghost of the ghastly figure, she continued.

"This isn't what I wanted. None of this is what I desired. And there is no going back from this. We've done too much. The only way forward is to let go."

Lavender tears flowed from the woman as she felt a pressure moving down her spine; there was no telling what would remain of her soul at this point. All she could think of was Inami, Calypso, Ulv, Mana, Khala, Deveta, her followers; so many faces and it all just hit as she knew the extent of what she was giving up. But this -- was hell. It wasn't her true power. All of this were the things she was born into and it turned her into an absolute monster. This soul...was truly tired of that.

So, the only thing to do was to make the hardest decision and kill it. To put an end to it all for the chance of a new beginning as a new being. This poison had to exit her body even if she was on the verge of wanting to vomit from the terror of her own mind giving so many horrible scenarios. But she knew if she kept this power, this sense of her self; her true self, may never come back. Always stuck in the shadow of pure and utter possessive intent in a world that no longer needs such demonic power.

"There is no coming back from this."

In a cold, stern voice; the pale-haired demon of grief clenched itself to Algos. It wanted to hold her, consume her and bring the woman back into that depth of sorrow. All that was within her -- was darkness. And in that darkness, was comfort. Comfort in power, consistency and the reality that not a single being could touch her in this world. And in that duality: that was the problem. No being could touch her heart. No being could ever truly hold Algos as she desired as there was an infinite universe of power blocking her from pain or pleasure.

"And there is nothing left in this life. It's time to move on. I'm sorry I couldn't be better."

Now moving her hand to her chest, Algos used one final swamp of power to cut her possessive powers. All of the years building her cocoon were no longer needed. Whatever her soul would turn into at this point was a mystery, but she knew it was the end of whatever she was at that point. As within this void, a bang of cosmic bright light emitted and in it all of that power ripped itself from her soul; fundamentally altering the status of her claim to demon odd and leaving only a pure, blank soul.

With tears overflowing the woman's eyes, the now white void brought her to the light as her body felt weak, in pain and overfilling with emotional grief as all the bonds she held as a demon brought with it an ungodly amount of torment on her physical body. Blood started to flow from her body, but through this pain something new was born. For now, she just wanted to rest in the ashes of what was left before awakening and arising from these ashes as whatever her new form will take her to be.